Today, for the first time in three years, I didn’t lose my shit over her passing on. I’m not here to tell you how to grieve, because everyone grieves in different ways. However, for me, it’s been true what “people” say. It gets better with time. Every day that passes, I learn to deal with her death better and better. Will I ever forget how things went down that day? Hell, no. However, learning to deal with her loss has made me a better man in many ways.
Her death–and dealing with her death–has prepared me for a lot of the mishaps and misfortunes that’ve come my way over the past few years. It’s also calmed me down a lot. For instance, as I’ve mentioned in numerous posts over the past few months, I lost my job.
Years ago, I probably would’ve thrown myself into a bottle and zoned out away from my responsibilities. Not in an alcoholic way, mind you, but in a way that was alcoholic-esque. It wasn’t a pretty sight, like, at all. Dealing with Mama Young’s death–or any death, if we’re being real–made me realize that life is short and I’ve got to enjoy everything about my life that I can. It’s also made me see that I’ve stressed the fuck out over shit that I didn’t need to. I’m growing because of her death.
So, yeah, three years have passed. But today, it doesn’t feel like it just happened yesterday. I guess I’m growing.
Thanks for sticking with me, readers. It gets better.